Friendship Friday: The Clever and Witty Elizabeth

12113331_10102324136194642_6031477205787160775_oPeople of the world, I would like to make a toast to a most wonderful woman named Elizabeth Brooke Rue. It was 9 years and 3 quarters ago that I doth first set eyes on this gal. I remember it like it was yesterday … the Downing University Center all-you-can-eat “Fresh” Foods. I can still taste the watery iceberg lettuce and soft serve ice cream. I was meeting our mutual friend Kelly (last week’s My Closet feature) for dinner and thought “who is this?” when to my surprise Elizabeth was with her. And thus was birthed a beautiful friendship.

Over the years we’ve had many trips to Barnes and Noble together, taken several roadtrips to far off lands and have laughed way too much. She is one of the most positive and empathetic people I know. She makes everyone she is around feel loved and valued. She has a strong sense of justice and would do anything for those she loves. Her creativity is off the charts. She has the wittiest and funniest things to say. There is very a dull moment when she is around.

10848656_10102324136199632_5664220615266973685_oWhile I’m forever and always thankful for Elizabeth, I’ve been especially thankful for her over the past three months. My mother has been having health complications and Elizabeth has been so supportive. Even though she lives in Atlanta and I live in Cincinnati, she has been so supportive. True friends will always be true friends no matter what. She has sent several very thoughtful cards. My mother is also very fond of Elizabeth, so I know this makes her happy as well.

So this Friendship Friday toast goes out to one of my favorite college friends. Also, that dress is simply amazing. Royal blue is a great color on you Elizabeth! Love you!

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My Closet: Alex’s favorite few

For this week’s my closet, I decided to re-connect with an old friend named Alex. Alex and I initially met about six years ago through a church community we were both involved with. I always found her creative side to be intriguing. For many years she worked in a bakery making cupcakes and pastries. She is now refinishing furniture and is excited to see where that takes her. Her creative side was often expressed through her clothing, so I thought she would be fun to photograph and chat with. Due to both of our busy schedules, we met at Carabello Coffee in Newport Monday evening. The space provided for a wonderful backdrop.

Alex is currently going through a de-cluttering process. This is something I commend. It’s called the KonMari method as the book (The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up) is written by a woman named Marie Kondo. The idea is simple: you take each item and ask yourself if it truly brings you joy. If the answer is no, you get rid of this. Kondo recommends that you de-clutter by category so that you don’t feel like you’re repeating the same thing over and over as you go through your home. Alex just finished going through her clothing, something I feel is quite fitting for this blog. These are the four dresses that made the cut for Alex. As I asked her about each one, I can understand why each brings her joy.

The dark plaid dress

DSC_0022As we spoke about each story, it became very apparent how important Alex’s husband Cory is to her. This story behind this dress is quite a sweet one. Alex currently works at the GAP. Last November/December, Alex and he were in the store together. She had set aside a few things to show him and this dress was one he particularly like. Since she worked at the store, she put it back in hopes that it would go on sale at some point. Yet the more she thought about it that day, she realized she wanted it. The next day when she came to work, she was devastated that the last one in her size had been bought. She just figured some random person bought it and so she moved on. When Christmas came, she found out that Cory was the one who bought that last dress and he of course bought it for her. How sweet. Also, he’s great at keeping a secret!

The black t-shirt dress

DSC_0032Alex is trying to incorporate more black into her wardrobe, so this is a great way to do so! She said Cory likes when she wears black. She said she finds this funny, though, as most people have too much black in their wardrobe. Not her, however. This t-shirt dress and hat are from Old Navy, and her bolo tie horse necklace used to be her dad’s.

DSC_0038The striped dress

This is another piece from Old Navy. At one point Alex joked that this may seem like a sponsored post for Old Navy and GAP. Not this time around at least. Here she pairs it with a whistle necklace she bought at J.Crew. The black shoes are a GAP find, I believe.

One thing she noticed after she finished going through her clothing and getting rid of the things that did not bring her joy, what was left just seemed to fit together better. While her wardrobe was smaller than before, together it just seemed to all work. As she paired her shoes and accessories with her dresses, I definitely felt that.

DSC_0043The date dress

Honestly, this last one is my favorite. I just love the cute, girly look to it. It comes from Madewell. Several years ago, Alex actually ironically bought it to wear on dates. She said she felt as though she was in a rut and planned to “get back out there” with some online dating. Right as she decided to do that, she DSC_0044met her husband Cory through work. She actually wore it on a few dates with him. It’s also lucky that he came along then … online dating can be an adventure.

Her leather jacket has made an appearance in several of these photos. It’s an Inc. by Macy’s jacket. It was a Christmas gift from her sister.

It was good to catch up with Alex. I’m excited to see where her creative passions take her. Also, since Cory seems to be pretty amazing, we thought we’d give his music a shout-out on here. It’s called Zoo and you can check out their Bandcamp page here.

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Friendship Friday: I’m excited to stand beside Sara!

Processed with VSCOcam with c1 presetToday’s Friendship Friday shoutout goes to my good friend of 10 years Sara. Sara and I met 10 years ago at Western Kentucky University when we both decided to volunteer our time during our freshman orientation. We both chose the Girlscouts and the ladies who worked there were so excited to have our help. Perhaps they were too excited because they suggested we run a Girlscout troop. While it was fun, looking back it was probably less than ideal for a group of college freshmen who were just getting used to campus life. Nonetheless, this is how Sara and I became friends.

Now 10 years later, Sara is engaged to a wonderful man named Brandon and their wedding is set for early April 2016. I instantly liked Brandon when I met him. He’s just a good guy and incredibly easy-going. I could not be happier for the two of them. A few months ago, Sara asked me to be a bridesmaid. I of course accepted. While weddings are fabulous excuses to wear dress, being a bridesmaid gives you such a special role in your friend’s big day. Also, it’s a compliment to get asked to be in the wedding party. That means you’ve played an important role in the bride or groom’s life.

Taken years ago. We really need more photos together!
Taken years ago. We really need more photos together!

Tomorrow after a morning work meeting, I will drive up to Indianapolis to meet Sara and the other bridesmaids for bridesmaid dress shopping. So it just seemed fitting to write about Sara. I’m excited for both tomorrow, the upcoming festivities and the big day. Sara, I hope it’s all you’ve ever wanted for your wedding day. I’ll do whatever I can to make it amazing!

Sara, thank you for being such a good friend all these years. You’ve always been there to talk, laugh, eat dinner with in DUC, have drinks with and all the other things. I have so many good memories with you over the year. This photo above is from when I visited you in grad school in Indianapolis. We decided to spend the day at the Children’s Museum because it is indeed amazing.

I love how determined you are. You are such a hard worker. It was so fitting that you finished graduate school before any of us. You put 150% into everything. On your big day, I’ll be glad to be there to calm your nerves. I’m sure you’ll be worried about all the small details. Knowing you, however, I know all the things will be taken care of.

Sara, I’m going to leave you with this photo. It’s from that time a year ago that I visited you in Lexington. You were driving us to meet your friends and I decided to take ridiculous photos. Also, when looking for photos of the two of us, I could’t find much. We should have taken some this weekend, so this photo is in place. Were going to change that over this next year.

Love you and can’t wait to stand beside you at the alter this Spring!

 

Two more dress photos. One she chose and one I chose:

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My Closet: The Amazingly Creative Kelly

Processed with VSCOcamThis week for My Closet, were making our way down to Bowling Green, Kentucky to hang out with my good friend of 10 years. Kelly and I met during the fall of our freshman year at Western Kentucky University. It’s crazy to think that time really has flown by. Now were both in our late 20’s, working day jobs and pursuing creative projects on the side. Kelly and her husband Tommy own a home in Bowling Green, and have added a dog, a cat and many fish to their family. Kelly shoots videos for the city of Bowling Green as her day job. She also owns a vintage rental company called Kiss Me Quick Vintage Rentals and Event Services. Kelly is very naturally creative, so I knew her closet would be fun to feature.

Kelly describes her style as “curvy vintage fabulousness meets get-shit-done practicality.” Some of Kelly’s favorite places to shop include Old Navy, Kohls, Lane Bryant and anywhere else she can find good deals on plus-sized clothing. The picture above is her favorite dress. She found it at Rugged Warehouse for only $20! It’s definitely has a nice pop of color. I love the girly sundress look to it as well. I would not have thought to put a light purple sweater with it, but it really seems to work. After all, Kelly has always had a way of matching things together, whether it’s decorating her home, putting together an outfit or making some sort of a craft.

The go-to

Processed with VSCOcamThis dress is Kelly’s go-to dress for work. Shooting video requires lots of moving around, so it’s important that she feels comfortable. She simply pairs this with some leggings and she’s free to move around as she wants while still looking professional. In addition to shooting a producing video for the city of Bowling Green, she also shoots weddings. I know Kelly takes her work very seriously, so it’s important she dress the part. She most often pairs her dresses with a comfy black flats.

The Sassy dress

Processed with VSCOcamThis next dress is what she considers her “sassy” dress. Kelly for sure has a sassy side that I think feeds her creativity. That’s always been a fun side of her personality that I enjoy. She said this one reminds her of 1940’s casual wear. She found this simple wrap dress back in college at Target. Oh and thanks to college pal Elizabeth Rue for taking these photos. Elizabeth just happened to be visiting Kelly this week and has been a great help!

The sexy dress

Processed with VSCOcamFor a nice evening out, Kelly often chooses this little number. Instead of a little black dress, she owns a little red dress. She found this one for only $20 on the Macy’s clearance rack! Kelly often pairs her dresses with classic vintage jewelry pieces. She loves old broach pieces and pendants. She often repurposes them herself.

The favorite dress

Processed with VSCOcamKelly is pictured here with her very friendly dog Margot. Of course Margot had to photobomb one of these … she always wants to be a part of the fun. This polkadot dress is by Elle, a designer that Kohl’s carries. Kelly says that sometimes it can be hard tonfind quality dresses in plus sizes. This was also one of few plus-sized dresses that Kohl’s even carried at the time. She used to work there, so she knows.

The other favorite dress

Processed with VSCOcamLike many women, Kelly’s favorite dress is her wedding dress. She found this for $300, which is an amazing price for a wedding dress. She bought it from a vintage recreation dress designer she found online. I was lucky to be in attendance for her special day. It was so much fun and pulled off so well! I remember there were all these little creative touches that made it very uniquely Kelly. They had the ceremony and reception at an old train depot in Bowling Green.

Kelly said “you do you” and “treat yo self” are her style tips. Thank you Kelly for sharing your wise dress wisdom. Also, if you’re getting married soon or hosting an event, you should consider hiring Kiss Me Quick Vintage Rentals and Event Services. Kelly will not disappoint.

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Jana and Women’s Rights in Nicaragua

Processed with VSCOcam with g3 presetI spent the month of July in Matagalpa, Nicaragua. I befriended Jana, a Peace Corps volunteer in town. Us American expats just have a way of finding each other, I suppose. When I was back down there this past week, I interviewed her about her experience thus far. This interview is so rich and full of substance. Jana will change the world for sure. I hope that by reading this, you gain a new perpspective on the world.

 

Name: Jana Hodgins
Age: 23
Location: Matagalpa, Nicaragua; from Portland, Oregon

So tell me, why did you join the Peace Corps?

Oh my gosh, a lot of reasons. There’s the total humanitarian aspect of it. I wanted to come to a country that I could help out in. There were a lot of personal reasons as well. I really want to grow as a person. I had never left the United States before. I wanted to see and understand another culture. I think that being in another culture and helping with public and global health is what I want to do as my profession and for the rest of my life. I think this is a good starting off point.

What draws you to public health?

Well I guess I wanted to be a doctor for a large portion of my life and when I got to college, I kind of realized what your day to day life would look like and the reality of it, I guess. As much as I think it would be cool to have patient care and all that, I really want to reach more people. I think it’s a pure numbers thing for me about the amount of people I could see in one day as a doctor vs. the amount of people I could affect in one day as a public health advocate.

received_10156135358485594Do you feel like we are lacking as far as healthcare on a global scale goes?

I think so. I was really shocked to see the lack of general health education. Students said on these surveys that they got a health education but then when they asked if they knew their own anatomy and the anatomy of a male or a female, they didn’t. So they said they got a sex health education and then they didn’t even know their anatomy.

So yeah, tell me about these surveys that you’re doing right now?

So I picked a focus for sexual health and violence, and youth. So I went into the public high school here in Matagalpa and did about 200 surveys, all just kind of gaging. The first page was just gaging when they had had sex, at what age and at what age their partner was, and if they used a condom, and if not, why not. And then the question on that first page also was “did you know about sexual health at this point in your life?” I got a majority of yeses. Like high majority. Like 90%. Then on the back it was true/false and there were a lot of like “I learned a lot from my friends, I learned a lot from my parents, you know like where did you learn this?” Then it was like “I know and understand the anatomy of a male and a female.” No. Or stuff like that. So that was one of the big contradictory things that they’re lacking in education. But another one that really got to me was that both men and women who said that men are naturally more powerfu, which was a true or fale, and they said that was true. Also said that it was false for women to be the victim of violence, commonly. So they said that men are more naturally powerful but that women are not commonly the victim of violence.

Wow.

Which women saying that men are natually more powerful is a form of violence to me, them thinking that. It’s just a big contradictory thing and I think that’s a global problem, especially for women.

So how do you think that women are seen here in Nicaragua?

Well I along with those statistics, I did get another one that said 4 out of 10 Nicaraguan women think women are the inferior sex. So womem actually see themselves as inferior. Yeah it’s just shocking that I think women actually see themselves as inferior and it’s portrayed that way because men think that as well.

So how do you feel as a woman here from the United States? What’s the contrast that you see?

I think I get a little bit of respect. I think it’s known that I come from a different culture in my work place and in formal settings. However I think I am subject to a lot more street harassment just because I look different. A lot of people think that I don’t understand Spanish. That’s a big factor in men treating me, you know, like I’m stupid because I can’t understand what they’re saying.

received_10156135355605594Yeah, what sorts of things do you hear yelled at you?

Oh goodness, well chilita is what I get most often. Chelita guapa, chelita hermosa, preciosa, princessa. And chilita means “little white girl.” So I get that pretty frequently. Sometimes it gets a little more vulgar when they’re saying rica or … what’s the word for papaya? I can’t remeber, but rica is very vulgar in the sense that they’re saying that I’m delicious. And then the word for papaya, which I can’t remember right now, is a slang term for vagina. So they’re saying things like that at you. Lot’s of slang about female genitals and a lot of like what they would want to do kind of thing.

So how does that feel to you when you’re walking?

It’s really hard. I tried … I feel like I went through some stages of sort of like acceptance. I was ignoring it at first and then I was talking back, and now I just take measures to try and avoid hearing it in general because it’s just so frequent and so forceful. I don’t know it imacts me more than it might other people. I’m a pretty sensitive person, so it’s really hard for me to hear these things and then let it go, and then hear these things five seconds later. Even if I do let one go, the next one is … it just really grinds my gears.

So when you would confront them, what was that like? What reactions did you get? Because you would confront them in Spanish too, right?

Yes, I’ve confronted several. But I guess as an example, let me tell you what happened this morning. On my way to the rural health post, I got cat-called by this group of three young men sitting on the curb. And I turned around and said “no, I don’t like that,” which is my general, like … that’s harassment, so you’re supposed to say “I don’t like that” and you take measures if it continues. And often times, unfortunately, when I say I don’t like it, they refute. They say “well I like it!” That’s what the men said this morning. One of them said “Well that’s Nicaraguan. Welcome to Nicaragua.” He said that to me in Spanish. And after that I just kind of brushed it off and I didn’t say anything more because I was on my way to work. So on the way back down, I came back and I walked right up to them. They didn’t say anything to me … because I was walking right up to them. They were like shocked. And I was like “what’s the point of your cat-calling? Like what is the point? Like I want to know.” No answers. Nothing. Like were like staring up at me and one of them was just like “just decir adios.” Which is the normal greeting and I have no problem with. And I was like “if a girl says she doesn’t like it, there’s really no point, right? Like there’s no point at all?” And they were just staring at me. Like blank stares, just no responses. They don’t know what to do with themselves, basically. I don’t think that they can come up wkth a point, honestly. As I started walking away I was like “yeah, there’s no point.” So I started walking away and then as I started walking away, they’re again yelling like “chile, chelita..” And it was just like “seriously? I was just over there asking you!”

Yeah, so that’s really interesting! I mean it is so much a part of the culture. I don’t know.

I’ve heard several times, I think it’s an example in Nicaragua as a part of the culture. I also think street harrassment happens everywhere. And a lot of arguments I’ve heard in favor of it, by men, are that men are supposed to be, if they want to get with a woman, if they want to date a woman, if they want to be with a woman, whatever it is, they have to be the forward factor. They have to be the one stepping out. That’s what women like. I think perhaps that’s true if you’re in a coffeeshop or a bar setting, and a guy comes up to you and asks how you’re doing, if he can get you a smoothie, or whatever. That’s a forward factor that I would enjoy. I really want to make a clear distinction that street harrassment is not about obtaining a woman. I think it’s a power situation and everytime a man yells something at a woman in the streets, it takes away her personal power, in that situation, in that moment.

received_10156135353660594So now you’re just in a place where you’re trying to maintain your personal power?

Yeah and that’s what it feels like to me, and perhaps I’m going a little strongly on that opinion and that’s why it’s getting to me so much. But I want men and women alike to recognize that this is harrassment and it if they can’t even come up with a point as to why they’re doing it, why is it still a part of everyday life?

So have you talked to Nicaraguan women about this? And if so, what have they said?

I have. Before my surveys, I had to interview community leaders to kind of see where I should focus and I asked about piropos, which is the cat-calling. Most women said that they didn’t like it but I did have a few women say that it was fine. They’re fine. I had one psychologist woman say “that’s fine. They’re bonito excepto cuando esta vulgar.” Like when they’re vulgar, they’re offensive, but otherwise if you say I have nice eyes in the street, fine, whatever.

That’s really interesting. So women don’t really like it and yet …

I think some women do. Some women would rather receive a “you have a nice dress on” in the streets than not. But they do get vulgar and that’s a big point. Peace Corps gives you a lot of information when you get in-country and there was one study that said that the men thought, well … I guess the reason that it’s a part of culture I guess in the nicer sense, non-vulgar cat-calling, the men thought they needed to tell a woman she looked good because otherwise she wouldn’t know. Some of the women even said in this study “how would I know if I looked good that day if they weren’t saying anything about it?”

Oh, so your opinion of yourself is wrapped up in what a man thinks of you? What is that?

Precisely.

That’s like a cultural thing that probably goes back pretty deep that could change, but … so I guess what do you see your role as? I think this rightfully riles you up in a way that you want to make statements and do things about it. But yet you’re also a foreigner in the culture, so not that you can’t make change but …

No it’s really hard because I came here to learn this culture and I don’t want to strip a culture of it’s body basically. You know what it embodies and everything. I guess I see my role as far as I can see it as educating the youth. There were several campaigns, I guess, educating the youth to let them know that that’s not really an appropriate thing. I think that’s probably where the future of it lies. I definitely don’t think that I could change a man’s opinion on the street and have him stop hiroping. I’ve tried to have conversations with some of the men who frequently harrass me on the street and they’re very unwilling to change. So I think the youth is really where I’d like to target and basically in education for sexual health and violence, because I think it is a form of violence and I think it could be done differently if they still want to continute yelling at people in the street.

Well I think too, from everything I’ve heard about Nicaraguan education, they focus a lot on memorization and less on critical thinking, so when you have these conversation, I wonder if these men can even think critically?

Yeah.

received_10156135358685594So has there been anything else that has been particularly culture-shocking?

I think my biggest culture shock was the passed-out, drunk Nicaraguans in the street. Which is few and far between but does happen. I have seen people just sleeping. They look like they’re homeless, but they’re faced down, passed out, drunk on the street. It was the biggest culture shock to me because I’m an EMT and you’re supposed to check for a pulse and breathing. The first time I saw one I was like “is anyone going to do anything abouy this?” Were just like walking around this guy. I was told “No, don’t touch him. Don’t do anything about it.” So that was very interesting.

Because in the United States, you know …

If that were to happen in the states, you would call 911. That person would be transported off in an ambulance and have an IV in their arm rather quickly.

What’s your longtern vision for your time here?

My vision, what I’d like to see, is younger girls about the time before they start their periods, like 8 and 9, getting educated by the older girla, 16 and 17, that I’ve educated. So I educate these senior girls who educate these younger girls, who have their information changed from what they’re going tk absorb and what they’re going to do with the rest of their lives. That would be sexual reproductive health and a better understanding of women, and women’s power and women’s empowerment.

What are some of the things that you just absolutely love about Nicaragua?

They’re very open people. This is my first experience out of the United States and there is just less of a personal barrier. People ask you straight up stuff that might be a little pushy or politically incorrect. There’s a lot of hugging and holding. Life if you’re sitting with your mom at coffee, it’s not uncommon to just be in an embrace. Or in the street I see mothers holding hands with their teenage and adult children. I also love that women pop their boob out to breastfeed here. There’s no blanket or coverup. It’s not seen as anything sexual like it is in the states. Here it’s 100% natural.

So what do you see after the Peace Corps?

I’m a little bit lost on that. I think that this is a good time to explore options. I have been looking at a few things. Another part of the culture that I really like is that it’s very very interdependent. You don’t need to move out of your house until you want to. People live in their houses until they’re 30 or even when you get married, your husband comes and lives in the house with you and contributes to the house. Grandma lives with you. Families live together or familes live next door to each other. I’m all about that interdependence. I’ve never appreciated my parents more. Never wanted to live with my parents more. I will be going back to my parents house and making dinner for them and cleaning up. And my grandparents are going to move to Portland so I’m hoping to stay in Portland.

Processed with VSCOcam with g3 presetWhat do you think needs to change most in our world?

My mom sent me an article yesterday that said “ISIS soldiers told to rape women to make them muslim.” So I think that the ideas of women being inferior need to go. We are way past that. I’m 100% equality and I don’t see it in any part of the world, so I think everyone could work on it.

Why did you choose to take the photos like you did?

The first one, the pink dress, I got from my boyfriend when he was here. When I picked it up, we were both just like it’s so Jana! I chose that one because it is so me and it’s an example of something I really shouldn’t wear here. So I got that to embody how I am, my style, how I’d like to portray myself but I can’t. I chose the black dress to be a bit more of an example. I usually wear an urban poncho over it. I put headphones and a hat with that one because walking down the street I often use headphones to avoid hearing piropos. If I can’t hear them still their eyes … their eyes are just hungry. They look you up and down, they lick their lips. It’s also offensive, so I keep my head low and try to avoid seeing and hearing those things on a day where I just don’t want to do that. The last one, the pink one, is a dress from my host sister. She got it for me for my birthday. It’s a little rischae. It has that backless part but with a sweater it’s not so bad. It’s a little bit long. I put the boxing wraps in that photo because I often use my boxing wraps and leave them on after practice and walk home in them as a way to kind of deter. I don’t know if it works, but it seems to work.

How does that make you feel? Not being able to wear what you want to wear sometimes?

Oh my gosh so hard. It’s weird because I planned on it. When I was packing I brought all these clothes … I just changed my style. I didn’t bring the things that I really like to wear. And then I was really saddened because I was with Peace Corps for like a whole week at this retreat and everyones wearing like their swimsuits and dresses, and I was just like I didn’t bring anything like that at all. It’s hard recognizing that I can’t really wear my style. I have dreams about picking out outfits at home. Like stuff I would be wearing at home.

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Friendship Friday: Brittany, my savior in Nicaragua

I’ve decided to start another new weekly column called Friendship Friday. I like alliteration and I like friendship more. Specifically, I love supporting and encouraging female friendship. Women are constantly told to be in competition with each other, whether directly or indirectly through messages in the media. Yet women are so relational and sensitive. My life has been so positively impacted by female friendship. So each Friday will be a little toast to a friend.

Processed with VSCOcamI write this from the airport in Managua, Nicaragua. I’m able to sit in a bar and have a drink in peace thanks to my friend Brittany. I’ve only been friends with Brittany since June, but there’s a special sort of bonding that comes from a shared experience in a new culture.

I moved to Matagalpa at the start of the American summer and had planned to work with a community organization for a year. Brittany was doing the same and was hence my roommate. A little over a month into my time in Nicaragua, my mom had a brain aneurysm. I rushed back to the United States with the essentials … a small bag with a week’s worth of clothing, toiletries, my passport, debit card, etc. Basically, I left stuff that I cared about in Nicaragua because I thought I was returning. Afterall, they stabilized my mother and I had committed to a year in Nicaragua.

Without getting into too many details, the option to return was not there after the three weeks I spent with my mother. I was devastated. At the crux of it all was my stuff. It wasn’t just my lap top, but my favorite clothing too. My dresses! I’m so excited to have my favorite dresses back.

Processed with VSCOcam with m5 presetBrittany is my friend of the week. Actually, I called her “amiga del año,” which means friend of the year in Spanish. It was a hard transition to have to work through on top of my mother being in the hospital. She was just there to skype or talk things through.

I originally was going to ship my things back, which made me nervous. You cannot entirely trust the postal system in Nicaragua. I then found a very inexpensive flight out of Chicago and jumped on it. Brittany was just so amazing in helping me make my short trip to Nicaragua a smooth one. She packed my things up for me and took them to our other friend’s house where I stayed. She also arranged for a driver to take me to the airport since I have a late flight and a lot of luggage. She really made my time in Nicaragua fun and stress-free.

Brittany, thank you for your support. I’m sitting here in the airport content. For my own sanity, I have my things accounted for and headed back to the states with me. You rock! I hope the rest of your time in Nicaragua is simply amazing.

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My Closet: the dresses of Jai

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This week were taking a look in the closet of Cincinnati’s biggest fan (okay, well at least I think she is). No, I don’t mean the Bengals or anything sports-related (not that Jai couldn’t be a Bengals fan. We’ve just never discussed sports). Jai is a woman who sincerly loves her city and making it a better place. I met her four years ago when I worked at a nonprofit in Over-the-Rhine. She worked as a barista at Iris Bookcafe which was maybe a two-minute walk away from my office. My coffee addiction is what initially made me visit the establishment but Jai’s warmth and enthusiasm is what kept me coming back. I really do not know how she stays so positive all the time, but she does.

You may be familiar with Jai’s community radio show Cincinnati’s Conscience. She hosted that several years under the name Jai All Day. These days, however, she’s just Jai. She’s taking a hiatus from the radio world and focusing on other endeavors. A full-time job at Gray and Pape plus her involvement in various community organizations occupies Processed with VSCOcammuch of her time. She has also been involved in various story-telling events. She has a strong committment to her community, which is evidenced in all that she pours her heart into.

In addition to her inner-beauty, this girl has a rockin style! Because our paths do not cross as much anymore, I hadn’t seen her in a while. So I thought, why not feature her for My Closet? It’d be a fantastic excuse to see her smiling face. So one evening she had me over for Moscoto and cookies, and we had a blast having a little photoshoot. It was just the boost I needed!

Processed with VSCOcam with g3 presetWhen I arrived, she came down to let me in wearing such a cute outfit that she claims she just “threw together.” A pair of boots, a teel sweater dress, a colorful scarf, black jacket and some fun hoop earrings. I was like “first, let me just shoot a few in what you’re wearing!”

She then showed me the collection she picked out for the shoot, each nicely laid out on her bed. Each of them are different and have unique story. Each are more than just a piece of clothing, but a collection of memories that evole emotion.

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 presetFirst, we have her two vintage dresses. This one with the black and white polka dots reminds her of her grandmother named Birdie Faye. Recently, shes been identifying a lot with her grandmother and stories from that time period. She even made Birdie Faye part of her name
on Facebook. She really seemed to have fun and let her silly side show in this one, claiming it makes her feel like Betty
Boop. She even stole my red shoes for a few of them! Hey, I’ll gladly share the wealth!

Processed with VSCOcam with m5 presetSecond, is this lovely mint-green gown from the 1950’s. A friend of her’s was giving it away and she seized the opportunity to add such a unique piece to her wardrobe. It actually used to belong to that friend’s grandmother. The kitchen seemed like the most fitting room to photograph this one. It provided us with a nice, vintage backdrop. With both of these, I played around with some black and white to take us back a bit.

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Processed with VSCOcamThis next one is what Jai calls her “mourning dress.” She wore it to several funerals and now associates it with mourning those losses. She said that for a while, it was hard to associate that dress with anything else. She did force herself once to wear it somewhere that wasn’t a funeral. The light in these ones was just so unique. The contrast it provides is so interesting.

Processed with VSCOcam with g3 presetNext we have her funky, artsy dress. The funky pattern reminds her of an old friend who was very artistic and also wore lots of unique patterns. She was saying that when you are around someone a lot, you end up adopting their habits wether it’s their speech patterns or personal style. That is exactly what prompted her to buy this dress! I just love the sunglasses with this one!

This last dress is the Jai dress. When shehosted her radio show, she hosted it through an organization called Media Bridges that helps everyday people with media whether thats shooting video, recording radio or what have you. Several years ago she

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won member of the year at Media Bridges. She wore this dress when she filmed a live version of her show. For her, this dress seems to garner up all kinds of happy emotions about her time as a radio host. It also looks stunning on her.

These little snipets I’m sure do not do these dresses justice. We live our complex and deep lives in our clothing. I felt so honored to learn these stories about the dresses of Jai.

 

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Sam: the traveling yoga instructor

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This week, I met up with an old friend named Sam. Sam and I met almost six years ago when we served in a Kentucky AmeriCorps program together. She served in Lexington and I joined halfway through the year in Covington. I just remember appreciating a friendly human at our trainings as I was the new kid on the block.

Fast-forward now six years later and I find Sam living in Cincinnati part-time and teaching yoga at Bikram Yoga Cincinnati. Since AmeriCorps, her yoga skills have taken her to Indonesia and Honduras. She’s for sure an interesting lady. What I especially love is that she chose to strike yoga poses when I took her photos.

Sam Young
27
Lexington, Kentucky; raised in Bardstown, Kentucky

So tell me a little bit about where you are in life?

We are currently sitting in a teacher housing apartment in Cincinnati. Definitely not anything I would have picked for myself or thought would be a thing. so right now I’m like getting used to being back in the United States. I’ve been traveling for a year so now it’s just kind of coming back into everything, getting used to it. it’s actually been very nice.

Very cool. so you are a certified bikram yoga instructor. and so that has been what, two years in the making now?

Yeah yeah. I went fall 2013 (to training in California).

How did you become a bikram yoga instructor? What inspired you to decide to do that?

I was living in Lexington and volunteering at a bike shop called the Broke Spoke. So we rehabed bikes, made bikes, all this stuff. So it was working for bike parts, so like sweat equity and the studio in Lexington had a free day. You could come, pay what you can. It was a by donation type thing. It was called a Karma Day. So I went and it was horrible. Oh my God it was so bad. It was so tough and I thought I was dying the entire time.

So was this a bikram yoga place?

Yeah a bikram yoga studio in Lexington. So terrible. I’m dying, I’m hot. I just gave them all my money and they’re yelling at me. Everyone looks like they’re in their underwear. Then I left and I felt amazing. It was like aw shit, now I have to do this for the rest of my life.

So you hated it while you were doing it, but then you felt … how exactly did you feel aftwards?

Just kind of clean. Totally clean. And sore.

So after that, you just kept going?

Yeah so I practiced for two years and I worked for the studio in exchange for classes. Like I would clean the carpets. So if you could imagine is a pretty dirty job in a hot studio. So I cleaned the carpets for two years and then I went to training and decided that that would be a good way of life and a good way to travel.

Have you done other forms of yoga?

It’s the first one I ever tried.

So what about bikram? What makes that the form that you want to practice?

For me, it’s a swift kick in the ass and it kind of exhausts me to the point to where I can’t do those terrible things to myself that you do in your mind where you’d obsess over things. It just cleans me out. I push my body to the point of exhaustion and my mind is just wide. And I’ve never really gotten that with anything else.

That’s cool. So for you, it’s both exercise and a form of meditation?

Absolutely more meditation.

So how often do you do bikram yoga? Is it everyday now?

Yes.

So how many classes a day do you teach?

I teach two and then I take one. I’m just a puddle of sweat all the time which is why I generally dress like a single mom. It’s just the most comfortable thing.

You’re a yoga instructor! That’s great. So what’s the philosophy behind bikram yoga?

It’s the mind-body connection you get from training your breath. I think that bikram is different than a lot of yogas because it’s traditionally very militant. I don’t really yell at people and no one yells at me in class, but it’s trying to connect two very different parts of your body that are connected through your spine and breath.

So you went to California, got trained and then … when did you go to Honduras?

I went to Honduras this past February. So when I went to training, I had no plans. I didn’t want to do this full time. But when I was there, Kentucky closed down the place I worked for there. So Kentucky changed it’s mind about what was best for people in transitional care. So by the time I got back, all the kids were in Foster homes. I was going back to that job. So it was really terrible because I didn’t have any way to say bye to them. Not a good situation. So I was planning on coming back and returing to my job, and just teaching part time. But I didn’t have any job to go back to, so when I got back I just had to run with it.

How did you find the opportunity to go to Honduras?

The Internet. It is an amazing thing! It’s not just a passing fad, I guess. That was the mosy recent thing. So I came back from LA, worked at my old studio for six months and then I started traveling. So I went to Indianapolis or up here, or to Columbus, Ohio. My brother had recently left the US, and he’s the first one of us kids to leave. And I was like, oh wow, that’s pretty cool! I could do that. That’s a thing that I would like to do. So then I left and I went to Jakarta in Indonesia and taught there, and went to Bali and South Korea, and then I came back to the US. I was miserable and didn’t like being here at all. So then I left for Honduras. I found that online on a traveling teachers website.

So was Indonesia your first international experience ever?

Yes.

So how long was your stint in Indonesia?

I was there for six weeks.

So what were your emotions like before you left? And taking such a long flight?

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It was really long and really stiff. You know when you sit in one place for so long. But I never had any experience like that in my life and it was amazing. Like “This airplane food! This airplane food is amazing! Look at these bathrooms!” Very much like a little kid because I had never experienced anything like that. I had been on a plane once or twice. I had a layover in Tokyo, which was great. And on the way back, I got to go to Vietnam and China just on layovers. But just the concept that you can do that. In 24 hours, you can go anywhere you want!

What was the culture like in Indonesia?

I for sure had culture shock very, very badly. I don’t think I handled it very well. From the moment I got off the plane, you know, it was midnight there and for me it’s 11 am. So many different sounds, so many different smells. I knew very little Bahasa when I went there. I ended up learning quite a bit more. Just being around it, you learn so much quicker. But very confused. It was the middle of the night. Made my way to the place that I was staying at by myself. It just seemed very disorganized. They thought that I was a Japanese man who was coming. It was a comedy of errors, but it turned out well.

Do people speak English a lot in Indonesia or no?

Some. A lot of my students spoke English, but then I would have classes where no one spoke a word of English. So that was very interesting to teach those.

What would you say you learned from your time in Indonesia?

I think over the past year, the thing I’ve learned from just being on the road has been really independence. In the US, we leave home at 18. Pretty much everybody does. You think you’re independent. But just really relying on myself. Like there is nobody else that I know in the entire country. These are the things that I need. I feel like I learned … Like my expectations and what I would think are reasonable things, that’s not the way at all. So that’s kind of a very arrogant way of thinking.

Yeah you had American expectations but you’re not in America.

Yeah exactly. It was good. It was very groovy, very weird, very intense.

So after Indonesia, where did you go next?

I went to South Korea to vist my brother. So I stayed there.

Seoul?

He lives in Daegu. It’s about three hours from there. His girlfriend lived out there. They both teach English. So I went out there with them and that was great. It was awesome and I loved it. Then it was time for me to go home because I couldn’t find any jobs.

Did you try to find work in South Korea?

Yes. They’re very, very particular about visas. I couldn’t serve a cup of coffee without a visa pretty much. Then I came back and worked in Indianapolis. Then moved to Tennessee and it was a not so great situation at all and I ended up leaving Tennessee after nine days. It was very bad actually. I had to live in a storage closet that was the same temperature as the hot room all the time. It was terrible terrible. The woman actually riped me off very badly. She ended up never paying me.

So I came back and was like “well I’ll do what I’ve always been doing.” So I found the traveling teachers page about Honduras. I’ve always wanted to go there since I was little. My dad went there when he was a little younger than I am now. It’s always been like “What is this place about?” It’s a great mystery. It’s such a tiny country. So I was just very grateful for that opportunity. I loved it. I fell in lpve with it immediately.

Did you know any Spanish before you went?

Un poquito.

What made you fall in love with it immediately?

It was the most beautiful place. I never could have even hallucinated anything as gorgeous as this country is. I lived in a really remote area, way up in the jungle where there is monkeys, toucans. I’m a Kentucky girl. I didn’t know about these things. It was gorgeous. I got into a lot of hiking and white water rafting down there. Just was a beautiful place.

So did you experience as much culture shock in Honduras?

No no. Not so much no. And I think maybe that was because one, it’s a lot closer. Two, I knew more about what I was getting into I think. My mindset was a lot better. I feel like I properly knew how to take care of myself. I had been living on my own for quite some time. Just wandering.

And it wasn’t your first International experience.

Correct.

So it was easier to manage.

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For sure. That was an amazing experience, there just wasn’t that much opportunity there. I’m really glad that I went. I would love to go back. I had a very difficult time leaving. I cried my eyes out as soon as I got into the taxi. So heavy-hearted for sure.

Did you live in the Ecolodge?

Yeah I lived in kind of this little treehouse. It was above this kitchen where all the guides stay at. So I loved it. I got used to sleeping in it. Imagine a treehouse-type deck thing with screens, so I very much was outside all the time. Now I have trouble sleeping inside.

So now you are living in Cincinnati part time and you have a job at Cincinnati Bikram Yoga and you teach classes there how many days a week?

Five days a week. I teach two classes a day. When I came back, I worked in Lexington’s studio and then just lived in the back of that studio, which was very nice and convenient. Then I went to Columbus and taught for six weeks. Now I’m here. I would like to go back to Kentucky, there’s just not so many opportunities there right now.

So do you want to do anything with social work?

Yeah that’s what I want to get back to.

So what do you see more as the long term vision?

I try to take it as it comes, I guess. There are things that I hope for and things that I would want, but as I’m getting older, I’m realizing that that’s not always the way things turn out. So if I had my druthers, I would spend my time doing what I was doing before: social services-type work in Lexington and then teach part time. That would be the goal. That would be amazing.

But now you’re just hanging out up in Cincinnati and they’re paying you. Might as well take the job.

It’s a really great studio up here. I’m really thankful to be up here. Good folks up here.

Yeah tell me about the studio? How long have they been around?

I want to say maybe five years. The owners just changed hands. I worked here for like a week before. But they just changed hands and that’s why were having an open house.

So how did you get connected with them? Friends?

Yeah it’s a pretty tight-knit network. I visited a bunch of times because a friend of mine used to teach here. This is the one closest to Lexington, so I’ve been here a bunch of times just passing through. There’s a website that kind of hooks people up.

So what made you want to get into social work?

I enjoyed AmeriCorps. I was in school for journalism at the time and I joined AmeriCorps, which is where I met you. My first year there in state and national at United Way of the Bluegrass and was a decent job. I didn’t feel like I could take on the capacity of such a big city as Lexington at that time. I grew up in Bardstown, so I was just driving back and forth. It was a lot of driving, so I moved there and did another year of AmeriCorps.

Is there a certain population you want to work with?

I really enjoyed the populations I’ve worked with in the past, which have been marginally-housed folks in the state of Kentucky. That’s where my hearts at. That’s what I want to do.

What is it about that population?

I don’t know. I fell into it and fell in love with it. That’s how these things go.

What do you find most challenging about that type of work?

It breaks your heart every day. I say that with a laugh, but it really does. I feel like if it doesn’t, you’re probably not so well-suited for that job.

So you grew up in Bardstown. What was life like growing up in Bardstown?

I am very happy that I grew up there. I was born in Lexington. My parents had three kids there. Then we moved to Bardstown because it was a better place to raise a family, smaller communtiy, things like that. They had two more kids there, so five total. We lived out in the country.

What are you most passionate about?

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I don’t know. I just feel lucky to be alive, honestly. I feel like most things I do are pretty full-on. I feel like I have the best job in the whole world. I’m very passionate about that.

What does being a woman mean to you?

Oh my! I don’t know. I don’t know if you can place a definition on it. Certainly not on the appearance. Like you and I are both women, but we look very different.I don’t know, maybe someone can explain to me what it means to be a woman.

What has been your proudest moment?

The proudest moment I ever had was when I was in Korea and I was with my brother who lives there and a couple of our friends. There was this mountain. I didnt think I would ever be able to do it ever. It wasn’t something I thought I was going to do at the beginning of the day, or middle of the day or about 10 pm when we were still doing it. There’s no way I ever thought that I could do that. It exhausting and very mentally challenging.

What do we need more of in the world?

She got out her phone and played the Youtube video “What the World Needs Now is Love” by Dionne Warwick. A very fitting way to end the interview.

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My Closet: Amber the Entertainer

Processed with VSCOcam with m3 presetEvery kid dreams of running away with the circus one day. Every little girl loves playing dress up. For Amber, these two things are very much a part of her adult life. Except she also owns a home, and is the mommy to several cats and a dog. As a sign language interpretor and a performer with the Cincinnati Circus Company, she definitely walks the line between youthful fun and responsible adulthood. And she does it like a boss.

In addition to performing with the circus, Amber attends conventions and works other events. Her life dictates that she have lots of fun dresses, so I thought she would be such a fun feature for this week’s My Closet.

Processed with VSCOcam with p5 presetFirst is her little black dress. This particular photo was taken at a casino night she worked for the Cincinnati Circus Company. The company offers casino nights for clients and they are often popular during the winter when people want to have parties indoors. Amber said this is one of several cocktail dresses that she often wears to work a casino night gig. She found this and several others at thrift stores. That way she said she doesn’t care if she gets it a tad dirty as she helps load out the circus equipmemt at the end of the night. I love the neckline on this one and how she pairs it with those sharp black heels! Like the lovely blue flapper ensemble, this one includes a lovely hair piece. I’m digging it for sure!


Processed with VSCOcam with m5 presetThis here is my favorite character (aside from Olaf) from Frozen. I just love this Anna dress! She wears this on circus gigs and the kids love it. Plus, Anna is the better one anyway. Like Amber, she has personality and a little sass.

Processed with VSCOcam with c1 presetThis next piece has a fantastic story. In the past, Amber worked for several years at the Old West Festival. She commissioned the skirt part at the Costume Gallery in Newport, Ky. The rest she built herself. She chose the color scheme because it makes her stand out in a large crowd. She has also worn it to the annual Steampunk Symposium held in Cincinnati every May. Steampunk is an artistic and counter-cultural movement about the era of steam and all things in it. This dress for sure is very fitting!

Processed with VSCOcam with m5 presetNext we have the dress with the best story. Amber found this elegant gown on sale at Dillards for only $10. This was back in high school when a girl needed dresses for all those dances. Also back then, we wore full-length dresses. High school girls these days seem to only wear shorter dresses to dances. What’s with that?

Processed with VSCOcam with m3 presetAnyway, so she found this dress for an amazing price and wore it to several dances including her senior ball on a cruise boat. Now from time to time she performs at spy-themed parties and wears this dress. She feels like it gives off a very “Jessica Rabbit” vibe. She also loves the backless look. I’m just amazed that she still fits into one of her high school dresses!

Processed with VSCOcam with g3 presetSpeaking of elegance, this one just looks radiant on her. She said that this blue dress is her go-to for a nice evening out. If the night out includes dancing (which it almost always should, right?), it has a nice and flowy feel to it. I personally think that the blue really stands out in this one. Well done!

Processed with VSCOcam with g3 presetYou may be wondering what Amber’s every day dresses look like. The one she wears most often for more casual things is this white one. The cotton material makes it very comfy to wear. Plus the fact that it’s more simple allows her to dress it up with accessories.

I just cannot get enough of Amber’s dresses. I’ll end by leaving a few more of her favorites here.

 

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Right on Target

First of all, I’m sorry for the pun. That was just … there are no excuses. Anyway I often find myself at Target. That place is a sinkhole, whether it’s shoes, housewares, storage bins and other random things. I’ve actually found some of my favorite dresses at Target. So the other day, I decided to take a look around. First, we’ll start with my favorite.

This is a nice, bohemian dress. It would be perfect with a pair of boots and a scarf. Ladies, do you have a good pair of boots? There are many good options out there and if you search, you can find a good deal. It’s worth it to continue wearing your favorite dresses through the cold weather.

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